A Gorgeous Girl's Guide To Social Anxiety

 Hi Everyone! 

Firstly, I'd like to head this post off by saying:

- I'm not a licensed psychologist or psychiatrist or anything like that 

- I'm in high school, so no need to take me too seriously

- This might help you out, but it might not! I hope it does! 

Now that that's out of the way, happy reading!

There are so many songs about how Karma is a b****.  I'd like to hear some songs about how social anxiety is a b**** too. 

Let's face it. If you're reading this, you've probably had a moment or two when you've been going to some sort of social event feeling terrible, purely because the event is social. I've been there many many times before. And there's -- say it with me now -- absolutely no shame in it. 

And despite the fact that almost everyone has probably felt that way at some point in their lives, it still stinks. A lot. 

Now I don't have diagnosed anxiety or anything like that, but for as long as I can remember, me and socializing haven't ever gotten along smoothly.

 Sometimes I'd be fine, like when I was a little kid and I was surrounded by adults because I'd never feel judged by them due to the age difference. They were grown-ups, I was a kid, and if they made me feel bad, it reflected poorly on them. (of course, none of these adults were rude or mean, but that was my thought process). 

Most of the time though, I would dread birthday parties and brunches and family reunions. This was driven by just one factor. 

I hated the way I looked. I hated my glasses, I hated my hair, and most of the time, I hated my clothes. I would be feeling so poorly about myself and at only seven years old. Now there are a million reasons as to why I had those feelings, but that's a story for another time. 

And those were just my reasons for feeling bad when it came to social stuff. Some people share these feelings with me, some people don't. Regardless, it is so important to remember that people and their experiences can be different, and that is perfectly fine. 

So there I would be. Feeling awful. A lot of the time. 

Now, if you're still reading, you've probably realized that almost all of this has been in the past tense. 

(Spoiler alert: this is where we get into how your social anxiety can be a thing of the past too). 

Here are some things that I tell myself over and over and over, which have helped me get rid of most of my social anxiety: 

- You don't owe it to anyone to look good or feel good. Ever. (I'm not talking about dress codes and wearing something fancy when the invitation says black tie. You get the gist)

- You are more than your thoughts, feelings, and appearance

- Everyone, everyone has bad days. While your feelings are always valid, it's best not to let a bad day mean a bad week

Last but not least, I'll leave you with a little something I like to call my four-layer anti-anxiety toolkit:

1.) NOBODY WILL NOTICE

2.) Even if they do notice, they won't think anything of it 

3.) Say they do think something of it, they won't have the audacity to bother you about it

4.) If they do bother you about it, that reflects poorly on them, not on you

I hope this helps, even if only a tiny bit! Until next time!